Is everything the same

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Crawling In My Skin

everything used to be so positive to me... the theme song in my head was just simply to 'always look on the bright side of life'... but now i guess people has all change... the environment has all change... and i won't be as optimist as history has written itself on... i used to be a photograph of rainbows, but now i guess i'm more like the negative film of other people's photograph

a thousand tears stared at me, but i could shed none... things felt so negative... other people's smiles, laughters, loud conversations provoked me to jealousy... the only loud conversation were just words of condemnation... there i was feeling sianz with hardly a companion... "jack, walk faster lah"... my feet felt on clay-like soil... my foundation felt shaky... my foundation was so light... i just followed the wind wherever it leads to me... a sense of fear indulged me... stabbed

when everyone sees my smile once... they thought i was okay... probably i just wanted to be quiet for a moment more or two... but when everyone sees my frown twice or thrice... they thought they saw nothing... my feelings felt so disrupted and complicated... i felt insensitive to my surroundings... i thought i woke up to a world of darkness where nothing cares and nothing bothers... it was purely just me and me against the world

sometimes i tried to seek attention indirectly... this time round, i just thought it would be better if i had given up... i felt so tired of this this tension, this attention... i felt so tired of this hunger, this craving... it would had been a waste of time to spit them all out now... it took me a thousand years to find the words 'friends' in my dictionary... but when i finally finally found it, a wind came and blew that one and only piece of paper off the book... now what's left of me

i want to be in another place... i hate it when you say you don't understand... cause you'll see what's not meant to be... i want to be in the energy flow, not with the enemy... a place for my head... why not you just go find another place to feed your greed while i find a place to rest... probably someday i'll just be like you... stepping on people like you do... running away from all the people i thought i had known... you'd just wear out your welcome... did you notice how quiet it is all alone

frm:
jack'al

spoken adhesives at 07:34

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Life's Reflection

in life we always try to run so fast and run so strong
but when it gets cold and it feels like the end
i just wanna forget about everything and runaway
against my will i stand aside my own reflection